How We Heal – Spirit Bear Coaching

How We Heal

 

This week I’ve invited Trace A. DeMeyer to write as my guest blogger. Trace is co-author of ‘Two Worlds: Lost Children of the Indian Adoption Projects’. If you remember, this was the book where I wrote and contributed a chapter about my adoption story.

Trace found me on Twitter after I had twittered, “If you want to know more about me, read this” with a link to a feature article of an interview I gave, in the best selling monthly magazine ‘Spirit & Destiny’. So the book is a product of social media. It’s amazing how social media brought together 17 adopted Native Americans to write their stories in their own words in this very informative and sad book. I say sad because after reading it, one is left wondering why non-Native Americans even bothered to adopt the children, who somehow felt that as a white race that they were more superior than the Native Americans, to treat them the way some of the stories are told. Unfortunately, a theme throughout history not only in North America but also in Africa, Australia and India etc.

By Trace A. DeMeyer, author of One Small Sacrifice and Two Worlds: Lost Children of the Indian Adoption Projects

For many years, Indigenous people were subjected to inhumane conquest while the tribes were referred to as murdering hostile savages. That mindset was deeply embedded in many people, shown in movies and it’s hard to erase that damaging image in history or books slanted nicely to the conqueror.

One missed lesson in this history: the most crucial goal of the nation builders in North America was to gain complete control of the land, and to achieve that goal, these governments targeted removing children from their tribal lands and First Nation families. For a few centuries, this method went on (using residential boarding schools and adoptions).  In Canada it was called the Sixties Scoop. Few people are aware tribal children were targets for assimilation by using non-Indian parents who adopted them. Thousands of children were lost to adoption in North America.  Parents also succumbed to pressure by non-Indian social workers to let other people adopt and raise their children.

Indigenous people knew what was happening with the dismantling of tribes and tried for seven years to have the United States Congress hear their testimony and in 1974 tribal leaders finally shared their stories of lost children which lead to the passage of the Indian Child Welfare Act of 1978. That federal act was good news for Indian Country. With this law, Indian parents would place the child in their own family so a family member in the tribe would adopt them and if that was not possible, another tribe would adopt the baby. Kinship adoption was thought to be the best option for baby and family. Why? Tribes rely on future generations to carry on tradition and culture and language.

How we heal from this history is to know this happened to children. We can find ways to repatriate these children back to their tribes and help them to reconnect. We can unseal their adoption records and enroll these children as members of their tribes. Sharing the truth about the Indian Adoption Projects will assure these governments never attempt this again. That is how we heal.

Trace A. DeMeyer
About me: http://www.about.me/Trace15
http://www.tracedemeyer.com
Twitter: @Trace15
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/Splitfeathers

 

Spirit Bear Coaching

Johnathan Brooks, MAC, PG Dip is a Cognitive Behavioural Coach who has trained in a wide range of treatment methods including the “Power Therapies” (CBT Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (postgrad), EFT Emotional Freedom Technique, Master NLP Neuro Linguistic Programming) and has a Post Graduate Diploma in ‘Coaching and NLP’.

 

National Adoption Week Archives – Spirit Bear Coaching

‘Every Child Deserves A Family’

As National Adoption Week (UK) begins to come to the close, Tunbridge Wells, Kent based The Index magazine ran an article about the book Two Worlds: Lost Children of the Indian Adoption Projects, in it’s November 2012 issue, Kids Corner section, p79.

Click on the link below to have a read.

Index_Parenting Nov2012 (2)

Blessings,

Johnathan

Johnathan Brooks, MAC, PG Dip is a Cognitive Behavioural Coach who has trained in a wide range of treatment methods including the “Power Therapies” (CBT Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (postgrad), EFT Emotional Freedom Technique, Master NLP Neuro Linguistic Programming) and has a Post Graduate Diploma in ‘Coaching and NLP’.

 

Wandering Spirit – One man’s journey back to his roots!

Wandering Spirit – One man’s journey back to his roots!

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I was born a Native American then adopted in a hotel lobby in San Francisco where the mothers met, probably over a coffee as one does, there they made the exchange. My new adopted mother being Countess Barbara von Bismarck returned to Europe, as my adopted father Steve Brooks worked as a Hollywood Exec for Yul Brynner (actor) was based in the south of France, and she wanted to be nearer to her family but not too near!

I eventually found and met my birthparents August 1989 and eventually became a recognised enrolled member of the Northern Cheyenne tribe. The missing part of my life puzzle was complete.

The Adoption Agencies and ex-American Indian Movement members really don’t like my cross cultural adoption story. It’s now illegal to adopt Native Americans.

This was published in Spirit & Destiny national (UK) magazine November 2011.

Enjoy!

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PS:  I noticed in the article that it said that my adopted mother snapped at me when telling me that I was adopted. That wasn’t true.

This is how I found out: I was about 6 yrs old and I was sitting on the carpeted floor at home watching an old black/white cowboy & Indian film. It was a stage coach raid scene where the Indians were attacking the stage coach with lots of shootings going on etc. Then my mother came into the room.

I had always sensed that my mother never really liked me shooting (pretend guns), so I decided to push the boat out a bit this time and with a pretend gun by using two fingers, I fired shots with sound effects (bang, bang) at the TV. My mother knelt down to eye level and looked at the film that I was watching and calmly asked me “Who are you shooting?” I replied back “The baddies…look …there’s one there!” pointed and then let off another round from my pretend pistol.

Mother: “And who are the baddies?”

Me: “The Indians of course”

In the old western films the usual storylines depicted that the cowboys the goodies and the Indians the baddies. Clearly, I was on the side of the goodies being a normal child ;o) my shadow side would come later in life!

Mother: You really shouldn’t be shooting the Indians, because you’re one, you were adopted.”

The difference between an adult’s significant world like ‘how do I tell him he’s adopted’ and a child’s playful world is this: I vaguely remembering not caring that much that I was adopted, but if I couldn’t shoot the baddies because I was one and I couldn’t shoot the goodies, then who can I shoot?

Now what identity do you think I and my mother might have un-knowingly set me up for?

– Spirit Bear Coaching

 

‘Every Child Deserves A Family’ – Spirit Bear Coaching

‘Every Child Deserves A Family’

 

As National Adoption Week (UK) begins to come to the close, Tunbridge Wells, Kent based The Index magazine ran an article about the book Two Worlds: Lost Children of the Indian Adoption Projects, in it’s November 2012 issue, Kids Corner section, p79.

Click on the link below to have a read.

Index_Parenting Nov2012 (2)

Blessings,

Johnathan

Johnathan Brooks, MAC, PG Dip is a Cognitive Behavioural Coach who has trained in a wide range of treatment methods including the “Power Therapies” (CBT Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (postgrad), EFT Emotional Freedom Technique, Master NLP Neuro Linguistic Programming) and has a Post Graduate Diploma in ‘Coaching and NLP’.